
Who Are You?
by Grayson
hopscotch, double dutch, kissing tag, barbie dolls
"let's play dress up, do you want to see my dolls?"
twirling around, "look at my new dress"
growing up, curling hair, wearing make up
putting on frilly clothes...
no...that was not me...
baseball, football, hide & seek, army men
"let's play war today. hey! i got a new bike.
wanna go build a fort?"
climbing trees growing up & changing(but not wanting to)
still doing things boys did, but starting to look
more like a girl
grew my hair, dated boys, went to prom
even wore a dress(yuck!)
felt weird, couldn't explain...
i think i was in drag
years later here i am...
crossing the lines between what i am and
what i want to be..
playing with fire
standing on the edge
flirting with disaster.
4-30-98
* * *
You Can't Change
by Grayson
I can bind my chest & cut my hair
but you will never change
I can stop shaving my legs & grow hair under my arms
but you will never change
I can stick a needle into my thigh & take a drug
that makes my voice deepen
and hair grow on my face
but you, you will never change
So wipe that smug look off your face
stop trying to pity me & my life
Until you've walked a mile in my shoes
don't bother me with your sympathy
My life will be altered in one way
Or another
But no matter how I choose
to live
I know that you
Will never change
6-24-98
(c)Maine Transgender Network, Inc., 2009